Missing Pieces
by Michelle Birkby
Summary: A few moments they left out of Threads...SamJack shippy. spoilers for Threads
1. Death

With a sigh, Jacob died, quietly, in bed, the last place Jack had suspected his friend would leave his life. Jack watched for a moment, saying his own silent goodbye. He contemplated going into the room, but decided to leave Sam where she was, beside her father's bed, murmuring quietly.

The base seemed oddly quiet as he walked back to his office. With Daniel in some not-dead state somewhere and Teal'c off doing his Jaffa warrior thing, his office seemed oddly bereft of people demanding his attention. Walter dealt with the most of the day-to-day problems of the base, leaving Jack to deal mostly with the huge 'the world is about to blow up, whoops, I made a mistake with that naquadah generator, the wrong kind of peas were delivered!' kind of issues.

At least that meant he could sit in silence for a moment, thinking about Jacob, and Kerry and Carter. Just one precious moment's peace, to get the turbulent thoughts sorted out.

"Sir?"

It wasn't an unwelcome interruption, when it came, seeing it was Carter. He looked up at her, standing in the doorway. Her eyes were red, but she was smiling, her blue eyes glowing as if lit from within.

"Hey." He said softly, getting up from behind the desk and going towards her. "You okay?"

"Fine, I think." He pulled her gently into the room, and sat her down, closing the door behind her. "I'll miss him."

"Yeah, so will I. He was a great guy." Jack said, sitting on the edge of the table in front of her. "I liked him a lot."

"He liked you." She said, smiling a little. "In fact, he never seemed to mind you calling him Dad." She told, her voice trailing off, her gaze slipping away from Jack, her face looking puzzled.

"Are you okay? Do you want some time off? I can arrange that…"

She looked back at him, smiling at the worried tone.

"No, honestly, Sir, I am okay. It's odd, really. Some of the things he told me, just before he died…well, they sort of made a lot of missing pieces in my life fall into place. Things seem a lot clearer now."

"Good." He said, looking puzzled, but sort of understanding. He knew, all too well, that death could make everything seem clearer and sharper, like a picture bought sharply into focus. "I thought we could have a memorial service for him here, as well as the burial, if that's alright by you."

"I'd like that. And I'd like you to speak at it, please."

"If you want."

She stood up, and looked at him, face to face.

"If you don't mind, Sir, there's something I have to do. Do you mind if I take the next couple of hours off?"

"No, of course not. Take as much time as you need." He told her, trying to see what was thinking. She looked different, calm, peaceful almost.

"And you'll be here, when I get back?" she asked.

"I always am. Got no-where else to go." He said, grinning, but deep down in his eyes she could see he meant something different from a joke.

"Good."

She looked down, and Jack realised that at some point in the last few minutes, he had taken hold of her hand. He couldn't remember doing that, but now was reluctant to let go. She didn't seem to be pulling away though, like she would have done before. Slowly, he stroked his thumb across the back of her knuckles. She didn't look up, but watched his hand in hers.

"Go." He said softly. "Do what you have to do. I'll be here when you come back."

He let go of her hand. She looked up, and smiled quickly at him, and left.


	2. Asking

Walter stood in front of him with the SGC flag clasped in his hand.

"Walter, I don't want that back! I know where it's been!"

"I know, Sir. Do you want me to burn it?"

"No, you can't burn it!" Jack cried, indignant. "That would be…"

"Inappropriate, I know, Sir. But you don't want it hung back up?"

"Walter, every time I look at that flag, I'm going to remember…"

"That it was once wrapped around Daniel Jackson's naked body. I know." Walter said efficiently.

"Walter…first, could you let me finish a sentence, once in a while?" Jack said, sitting down heavily behind his desk, and putting his head in his hands. "And second…never, **ever** mention the fact that Daniel was naked in my office and I saw him to anyone. Ever. Especially not to me. Clear?"

"Crystal, Sir. So, shall I buy a new flag?"

"Yes." Jack sighed. "And put that one…"

"In deep storage." Walter replied, thinking he could probably make a fortune selling bits of the flag to certain women (and a couple of men) down at O'Malley's. "And Sir? I thought you might like to know that Colonel Carter is on her way up here."

Jack ignored the odd little twist in his stomach, just as he had been ignoring it for nearly six years now, and just stared at Walter.

"I'm going to start calling you Radar." Jack announced.

"That's fine, Sir, as long as you don't call me Davis."

"Why not? That's your name!" Jack said, highly confused.

"No, Sir, my name is Harriman. Walter Harriman." Walter said stiffly.

"Since when?"

"Since always." Walter said through gritted teeth.

"No, it used to be Davis. I remember calling you Davis." Jack insisted.

"Sir, for the first three years you were here you called me 'Chevron Guy."

"But you used to have to have 'Davis' sown onto your uniform. Right here." Jack said, gesturing at his heart.

"Well, it's Harriman now."

"What, did you get married?"

"If that's all, Sir." Walter said grimly, leaving the room.

"Are you in the Witness Protection Program?" Jack called after him.

He was distracted by someone giggling at the other door. He turned sharply, and saw Sam standing there, leaning against the doorframe.

"He confuses me." Jack said, gesturing after Walter.

"I can tell." Sam replied, grinning. "I thought you might like to know that Daniel is none the worse for…whatever he went through."

"Good. I just hope he doesn't make a habit of this, appearing naked all over the place. It was very disconcerting."

"Really? You coped very well." Sam said, sitting down in front of his desk, still laughing.

He was relived to see her so happy. Whatever she had done in that couple of hours between her father's death and rushing back to help him save the universe again, it didn't seem to have upset her too much. In fact she seemed more contented and peaceful than she had in a very long time.

"So…what can I do for you, Carter?" he asked, remembering she had specifically wanted to talk to him after she came back, and half-dreading, half-eager for the conversation.

"I heard you broke up with Kerry." She said, softly.

"Walter?" he asked. She nodded, smiling.

"I swear that man would have burnt as a witch years ago." Jack muttered. "Yeah, she dumped me."

"You're okay about it?" she enquired.

Okay? He didn't know. He'd liked Kerry. Had a good time, relieved the loneliness.

Well, he thought he'd relieved the loneliness. But the truth was, with Kerry, he was just as alone as he had ever been. She liked him, slept with him, laughed at his jokes, watched the Simpsons with him, but the entire time he'd felt he was putting on an act, trying to be the Jack she wanted, the perfect guy. He'd never felt really relaxed around her.

And the moment Sam had turned up on his porch, and he'd suspected that she was about to pick now, of all moments, to take it out of the room, he'd known he'd swap Kerry's company for a lifetime of loneliness somewhere near Sam in a heartbeat.

"Yeah, I'm okay." He said, nonchalantly.

She nodded her head a second, then said, out of the blue.

"I broke up with Pete."

He dropped the pen he'd been fiddling with.

"Gave back the ring, broke his heart, the whole deal." She said, staring at Jack very intensely. He swallowed.

"Oh?" He managed to say.

"Yes." She continued. "I…I just wasn't happy with him. he wasn't I wanted. And my dad said 'You can still have everything you want' and I…I knew I didn't want the wedding and the house and the dog everything…not with Pete, anyway. I was just going on with it because I thought it would make him happy. But it didn't make me happy." She trailed off lamely, still watching Jack, waiting for him to say something, anything. Just that one perfect word that would give her the impetus to carry on, to make the next step. Just something to give her that last push of courage.

"Oh." He said. She sighed.

"My dad also said," she said, looking down at her hands, entwined in her lap. "that I shouldn't let rules stand in my way. I didn't understand then, but I sort of got the gist later, when I was breaking up with Pete. So, Sir, I was sort of wondering, if you could take me fishing?" She said, looking up hopefully.

"Fishing?"

"Yes Sir, fishing."

All these years. All these years of asking, and waiting and hoping and knowing she'd say no, and asking anyway, and finally, finally, she asked him herself. He tried to breathe, but seemed frozen, totally unable to move. Daydreams weren't supposed to come true, not like this, not for him.

"Sir?" she asked, her voice small and quiet, afraid she'd made a big mistake, one she could never come back from, 'oh please let him say yes', she begged silently, 'let him say yes, it's all I really want now.'

"I…I…damn!" he said harshly, making her jump.

"What?"

"I already asked Daniel and Teal'c to come to the lake this weekend."

"I know, but they're not coming until tomorrow, and I know Daniel's got this tape he wants us to look at but I thought we could leave right after that and go to the lake tonight." She said, running out of breath.

He continued staring at her.

"Or not…." She said, under her breath.

"Walter!" Jack bellowed. He got up and came round the desk. Walter appeared in the other doorway quickly enough to make Jack suspect he'd been eavesdropping.

"Sir?" Walter asked.

"I'm going to Daniel's office to look at this tape and the ZPM module he says he's got and then I'm leaving for the weekend, and I do not want to be disturbed **under any circumstances whatsoever.** Is that clear?"

"Yes, Sir."

"I don't care who's attacking the Earth, and what the President wants, or what Ba'al is up too or what freaky mess Dr Lee has got himself into or what Felger's managed to do this time. Do…"

"Not disturb. Yes Sir, I've got it. And the same for Colonel Carter?"

Sam looked round at him, then stood up to follow Jack.

"Yes, the same for Colonel Carter." She told him.


	3. First time

She'd been quiet for the last half hour or so as they approached the lake. Quiet, but nervy, taking her sunglasses on and off and jumping when he'd had to brake suddenly. He hoped she wasn't regretting it. Nothing had actually been said about what would happen when they got there, alone. Maybe all they would do would be to fish, or rather, try to fish.

To tell the truth, he was getting nervous himself. It was all very well daydreaming about this sort of thing. In daydreams he had the time to work out exactly what he was going to say, exactly what moves he would make. And in daydreams she would find him irresistible and sexy, and fall in with his plans readily. Somehow he couldn't imagine the real Carter being quite so easy to predict. He'd certainly got it wrong over the past year or two.

So two very nervous people pulled up to the little secluded cabin by the lake that hot summer afternoon. She got out, staring round at the country around her. It was peaceful, and green, and very alive, with a cool breeze sweeping across the lake, stirring the leaves above her head. All she could hear were frogs in the reeds, and the soft susurration of the trees.

"It's beautiful." She told him, sincerely. He grinned.

"It's okay." He said, breezily, but she knew he was touched by her appreciation. She reached over to her bags, but Jack stopped her.

"I'll take those. Host's privilege, Carter." He insisted, before she could argue. He took them up to the cabin as he walked towards the lake.

He wasn't sure where to put them, and ended up leaving them in the hallway rather risk assigning her a bedroom before she chose for herself. He watched her out of the window for a moment, as she stood there staring out across the lake, turning her sunglasses over and over in her hand. He'd thought he'd never see her here, with him, and he wanted to fix the memory firmly in his mind.

Then he took a deep breath.

"Last chance, O'Neill." He murmured to himself. "Don't screw this up."

He came out of the house carrying two bottles of beer.

"Drink, Carter?" he called, approaching her. She took it, saying,

"I think you can call me Sam again, Sir."

"Again?"

"You used to." she said, wistfully.

"Alright then…Sam." He said, raising his bottle to her, then drinking. She raised her bottle too, but didn't drink. Instead she placed it carefully on the ground.

She stood staring out at the lake, but didn't really see it. She was too intensely aware of the man standing behind her. The knowledge that she loved him had come slowly and agonisingly to her, and the knowledge that he loved her had gone long ago. She was painfully aware that she had come so very close to losing him, and now was unsure that she could ever get him back again. It was only when she'd seen him with Kerry that she knew how far he'd slipped away from her, and the fact burnt her.

Still, she was here, at the lake, fishing, and it was going to be now or never. She span suddenly, stretched up on her toes, and kissed him.

He was taken by surprise, and didn't have time to get rid of his beer and wrap his arms round her. She'd misjudged the distance, and had ended up kissing the corner of his mouth. She was clutching the front of his jacket, off-balance and afraid she'd fall. All in all, she thought, it wasn't the world's most successful kiss.

But finally, she had kissed him. And there was nothing wrong with the spark of electricity that leapt down her spine, or the warmth of his skin on hers, or the way his hand in the small of her back felt _exactly_ right.

She stepped back, panting.

"Sorry." She said. "That went a little wrong. I'd imagined it all being a lot easier…" she trailed off. There was a look in his eyes she hadn't seen before, and it scared her. She was suddenly terrified she'd done the wrong thing.

"That wasn't right." He said, putting down his own beer. 'Oh god' she thought 'I have lost him, I've been so stupid' and the world fell away from under her feet.

"First kisses," he said, moving in closer to her, until she felt her whole body tingle with the nearness of him "are supposed to go like this." He put his hand under her chin, and lifted her face to his. Achingly slowly, he bent down, and kissed her gently, on the lips, as his other hand reached round behind her to pull her in as close as he could get her. She reached her arms up around his neck, and pulled him. The kiss deepened, as she opened her mouth and felt his tongue slip gently into her mouth.

And this time the kiss was perfect, and they did not stop kissing for hours.


	4. Finally

Darkness had fallen hours ago, and they hadn't noticed. They'd been surprised when they'd tumbled happily out of the cabin to see the stars were out, and the cool breeze had turned rather cold.

They stood by the lake where they'd kissed, hours before, and he wrapped his arms around her to keep warm.

"Did I ever tell you you're wonderful." He murmured, kissing her ear.

"Yes." She smirked.

"Did I ever tell you're amazing?"

"A few times."

"Brilliant?"

"Often."

"Okay...did I ever tell you that you're beautiful?"

"Once or twice." She acknowledged.

"Even though it's against regulations."

"You hate regulations." she reminded him as she snuggled into his arms.

"Did I ever tell you I love you?" he asked, suddenly serious. She turned round to look at him.

"No, you never did." She told him, softly, in almost a whisper. "Not in so many words."

"Well, I do." He said, kissing the palms of her hands, one by one. "And you?"

"I have loved you for a very long time." She admitted.

"Well, that's alright then." he said, pulling her closer. "Is there anything we need to talk about, at all?"

"I don't want to talk." She said, and she took his face into her hands, and kissed him , again, and again, and again.

THE END.


End file.
